Thursday, March 15, 2012


I'm a mess. My house is clean but I am a mess. The laundry is caught up, well as caught up as it ever can be, but I'm still a mess.

I sliced my hand wide open on a piece of glass yesterday. I was cleaning up the back deck, getting things out of spring. A piece of glass went right up in to my palm. It was, like something out of a movie, a blood geyser. Thankfully, my 11 year old cousin was over playing with R and T. Half a roll of paper towels later, a last minute doctors visit (did you know Tetanus shots are good for 10 years? They are!) and a lot of bruising later...I have one  heck of a sore hand.

And also a strict warning about my blood pressure from my doctor.

I'm 27 years old and my blood pressure was high yesterday.

My doctor, a longtime family friend, said I need to learn to take breaks, take time for myself and relax. I need to cut some stress out. I need to rest more, work less.

Does this man know me? I'm not good at that. I'm a mess remember? I'm constantly running in 92 directions at once, with a to-do list a mile long. I have clinical depression, anxiety and problems sleeping. I'm overweight, I'm overworked and I'm a mom of 2 toddlers. I am a mess.


I'm doing the best with the mess that I am. I'm eating healthier and exercising regularly. I'm taking my medicine on schedule and journaling. I'm growing in my Faith. I'm taking time each day to do conscious, purposeful mom-school with the kids. I'm chipping away at my to-do list. I'm trying. I'm still a mess and I probably always will be. And that just has to be okay.

Side note. My uncle passed away on Monday afternoon. He was a wonderful husband, father, uncle, teacher and humanitarian. Thank you for all the thoughts and prayers. He will be missed!


Tayler said...

Kate, being a mess is okay sometimes. I'm a mess most of the time. The way I see it, you are incredible. I have no idea how your house is clean and your laundry is done, that in itself seems like a miraculous feat. I still can't imagine how you do what you're 27 with a husband, a house, two small children, and you run a successful business. A business that is more of a second family. And now you're taking on this weight-loss challenge, which is also super inspiring. Just remember that one person can only do so much. And when you feel like you can't breathe, take a break. Even if it's two minutes. Even a mess deserves a break :)

Amber said...

You have to learn to take time for yourself, and slow down every now and then. You're such a hard working mama Kate, you deserve a break sometimes! xoxo

Neely said...

Sweet friend, pour a glass of wine, take a bubble bath and give yourself an hour. Love you!

Melissa said...

Yep, it is okay! I agree w/ Neely's comment though. ;) Praying for you & your family in the loss of your uncle. HUGS!

Kristin said...

Everyone has to be "a mess" at some point in order to get back to the way they want to be. My house is a disaster and I'm okay with that because it's just me here right now and no one is judging me on my ability to do the dishes (I would get an "F"). You can only do one thing at a time. And doing things with purpose sometimes takes a lot of time. Keep praying and don't give up, Kate! :)